Project 365 of 2017: Days 162–175

4

Wow, it’s been a minute! My apologies for that. This is a somewhat complex “Project 365” post containing a brief description of past two weeks.

Project 365 of 2017: Days 162–175. Back to work

Day 162

It’s always hard to return to your working duties after the long break. Today I sat in the office and tried not to fall asleep. This very inconvenient condition was interrupted by the important conference, where I had to participate.

Day 163

Today one of my colleagues suddenly died after a heart failure. We talked yesterday, and today he is forever gone. Almost a year has passed since the last death I witnessed emotionally.

Days 164–166

These three days were quite boring and filled nothing but work. I tried to achieve my previous state of working mind and remember all task and “side quests” from pre-illness times, but it was almost impossible. Now I barely have a single doubt that a work change is a bad idea! I should find my balls and perform a resignation. I really need to develop new skills and change my occupation. Oh, World, how happy I’ll be then. I hope that I do it the right way.

Day 167

I’ve met with my old friends today. We spent several hours playing the guitar and talking. I haven’t seen them for ages!

Day 168

Yet another day at home filled with stagnation and self-blaming.

Days 169–170

Thoughts about resignation are even stronger in my head these days. I’m not happy with the current situation, and I don’t see how things can change in the short perspective. Like I get stuck in a swamp, and all my movements only set me deeper and deeper.

Day 171

November has started, and I decided to do my physical exercises almost every day. I did it three times per week earlier. Now I want to try to do my workout job in a slightly more intensive way.

Day 172

This is the second day of my workout marathon, and I’m already tired af! My hands are shaking constantly, and I can’t even bend down.

Day 173

It’s a short working day today as we have a holiday tomorrow. I worked from 8 a.m. till 15:30 a.m. and then moved to Patootie. I decided to visit her local shopping mall and buy myself a new pair of winter boots and a number of t-shirts and hoodies as well. I spent an enormous amount of money on various clothes during last two months. I hope that that action will finally close a quite expensive clothes question in my budget for at least couple of years!

Day 174

Today I’ve finally managed to take my new succulent plant from Patootie to my home. I hope that this flower won’t die soon. My plants are in very bad shape now. I haven’t posted news about my little garden for a while because there’s nothing to be said. It’s cold outside, and it’s cold inside: my plants are dying, and so do I. Sometimes (like at this particular moment) I think that it could be a good idea to write something about flowers… I will probably write.

Day 175

Spent that day at home sitting alone.